At least, that's what Jon calls it. Me? I call it bittersweet. So, the lumps keep coming this week with the news that they are giving the manager position to someone else. The new guy starts next week. He was an assistant manager for a store in Orlando but a manager for other companies. This is such a smack in the face. I mean, dude hasn't even been manager for us before and his AM position with the company isn't even his last job. I got the whole spiel about how he loves books like the rest of us and is excited that he will have such a dedicated assistant, blah blah.
Yeah. Well, he won't for long because I turned in my notice last night. (sigh)
Believe me, the decision wasn't made lightly. I've actually been preparing for it since last week. I knew what was going to happen.
I'm not sure when things stopped going in my favor. But you know what? C'est la vie.
Michael and I had lunch yesterday and discussed it. Yeah, I could have waited until the new guy gets here. And I don't blame him and there are no hard feelings on my part towards him. Heck, there aren't even any towards the company really. It's just business. I feel more tired than anything else. And that is what clinched it. My reaction at first was utter sadness. I wanted to sob but I had to do my job. And I did it well yesterday. Sure, I have moments of anger but mostly I am just exhausted. Disheartened, I guess you could say. I need a break. Too much too fast.
Pros of staying: My discount. Show of loyalty and my mettle. Work somewhere I love. Continue to have extra money coming in. Keep my coworkers happy to the best of my ability. See that what has been set up for our regulars isn't blown to hell.
Cons of staying: I can get as good a discount other ways. Besides, as long as Mike works at the other store, we have the discount. Obviously my loyalty and worth don't really mean much. Yeah, I love it but it has been stressful as hell. I can get another job -- one that is less stressful and pays almost as well. They need to fend for themselves. I love em all but I have to do what's best for me right now. My customers -- well, that's the only one I feel real regret about but I'm sure they will adapt or go elsewhere. No matter how competent the new guy is, Christmas is just not the best time to have to get to know someone. It skews the learning process. Happened last year with Jessica. I've already done my "loyal to the new manager" bit. He can be an awesome manager and I'll still end up doing as much work as I am now. And you know what? I don't have the time. I have put of my dissertation and my housework for far too long. I am not going to be able to handle five classes next semester plus the diss plus the house. I would have tried my damndest if I had gotten the position because I would feel more responsible and I don't shirk that if I can help it.
But let's be honest. . .I haven't done a very good job of doing all three. Something was gonna have to go. Well, as Val kept reminding me, the bookstore was never meant to be a career choice. I wasn't going for the job with my whole heart. I did it because I thought, well, maybe it was a viable option. But no, I gotta get back to why I came here in the first place. Hopefully I haven't screwed that up. Time to bust my ass and catch up. But I sure am gonna miss being at the store.
Wednesday, November 21, 2007
Monday, November 19, 2007
Valerie and Dale
So, I caught you up on the work stuff but you never got to hear about Val and Dale's wedding because of all my drama last week. Sheesh.
The wedding was on October 27th. It's one of the reasons that Mike and I decided to have ours next year (if you don;t remember that part of the reasoning).
The two had met in March (I believe) of last year at a sci fi convention in Maryland. Got to see the exact spot they met which was pretty cool. Anyway, after a whirlwind courtship, they were engaged and had that date set. Val would have preferred to elope but Dale wanted a traditional wedding. I know, that's the opposite of how it usually happens but he has two sisters and a traditional kind of family so I guess that's why. Let me tell you. . .by the time the wedding came around, he was ruing the choice. lol Especially as Val reminded him a gazillion times about who's idea it had been. I actually felt sorry for him. (heehee)
As you are probably aware, that date happened to fall right after the rainstorms had come through the east coast. I told Val that she should have had the wedding sooner cause then the drought might not have lasted as long. (she wasn't amused) It was to be an evening wedding. So, you can imagine how nail biting it was to have it still pouring late into the night on the 26th. Val was miserable that day. The whole thing was set to take place at the Cloisters: a beautiful castle-like structure set in the woods. The place was perfect for her. Problem was, they hadn't really planned for an indoor wedding. The reception was supposed to be inside but not the ceremony. We went to the Cloisters to develop a contingency plan. The place was gorgeous. And it can work for indoor stuff too. They have events all the time and are used to having to accomodate such things. Problem was, indoors is not what was planned and Val said that she could have chosen any number of other places if that was what had been wanted.
Let me make something clear: Val had not been your typically giddy bride. She was not looking forward to the whole shindig at all. Oh, she was looking forward to getting married but not to the rigamorole. And to be fair, she didn't have an easy time of it all. They may have met in Maryland but they planned most of it all long distance. She ended up in Huntsville, Alabama, earlier this year and has had to plan for several major life changes all at once. So, her being stressed was understandable. I just wish she had been happier about it all but the anticipation of the wedding just couldn't overcome all the other stuff.
Fortunately, the weather cleared by noon on the 27th. Us girls -- Val, me (MOH), Jessica (childhood friend), and Anne-Marie (work friend) -- trooped to the hair dressers and Val's spirits started to pick up. She got the normal nerves thing going on and everything but seemed in a much happier place. When we all got back to the hotel and were finally done up, she was doing much better. And oh, she made such a lovely bride. She'd chosen a beautiful lace sheath dress. She was simply stunning in it. When I get some pics, I'll post one. I figured that picture taking was the least of my responsibilities that day.
We all went to the Cloisters for the picture taking. Because it was an evening wedding, we had to do the pics beforehand. Ok, here's where things are a little complicated. Dale is Catholic but Valerie converted to Judaism (from Lutheran) about two years ago. So, the ceremony and stuff was actually Jewish. Because there's a part where Dale and her are together for the actual ceremony, him seeing her beforehand wasn't a big deal. So, that whole tradition of not seeing the bride before the wedding didn't matter.
The photographer was awesome. He did an amazing job of setting it all up. My favorite moment was when Dale got to see her for the first time. He had the properly stunned look on his face and she was giggling like a schoolgirl. It was like it was only the two of them around. Such a movie moment. One of the reasons being outside was so important was because the Cloisters has a windmill and Val so wanted the wedding party pics to be there. That was fun. After that came the family photos and the rest of us ended upstairs.
I'm sure I could have stayed downstairs to help but I thought that I would just be in the way. It was a tossup cause I know she wanted me to help keep her mom from driving her nuts but I didn't know how I could do that for the photo stuff. So, I just waited. Finally they all came upstairs.
All of the wedding party and immediate family gathered around in one of the rooms so that we could watch them sign the Jewish marriage agreement. It was a cool little part of the ceremony. Then came the aisle walking and all that jazz. I messed up a little with Val's train because I forgot that she needed me to hand it to her so she could walk around Dale three times at the beginning. I wanted to straighten it out pretty. lol It didn't seem to be a big deal. We hadn't had a rehearsal (just a verbal run through) so hopefully I'm forgiven. The rest went off pretty well. The only thing I felt the OCD need to tweak was when her veil went back. It didn't completely go straight on one side and I didn't want it to look goofy in the pictures so I quickly steeped up and tweaked it down straight. lol Val didn't even know I had done that til later.
The reception was very elegant: open bar, cheese, dessert. Very simple but beautifully done. My speech was impromptu and not the best thing in the world (bad speech teacher) but I wanted to go with the flow of the moment and emotion rather than something rehearsed. I had a few things planned but mostly I just went with the moment. Afterwards, Val danced with her father and also with Dale. It was the only dancing that happened. I thought maybe seeing her with her dad would make me feel sad since I won't be able to do that but it just made me smile. Besides, it's when I got to help her mom out so that was good. Her mom had done really well not to cry until then. It was sweet.
Overall, the wedding went off without any major snafus. There were minor things but it was an awesome event. Just as elegant as Val could have wished.
The wedding was on October 27th. It's one of the reasons that Mike and I decided to have ours next year (if you don;t remember that part of the reasoning).
The two had met in March (I believe) of last year at a sci fi convention in Maryland. Got to see the exact spot they met which was pretty cool. Anyway, after a whirlwind courtship, they were engaged and had that date set. Val would have preferred to elope but Dale wanted a traditional wedding. I know, that's the opposite of how it usually happens but he has two sisters and a traditional kind of family so I guess that's why. Let me tell you. . .by the time the wedding came around, he was ruing the choice. lol Especially as Val reminded him a gazillion times about who's idea it had been. I actually felt sorry for him. (heehee)
As you are probably aware, that date happened to fall right after the rainstorms had come through the east coast. I told Val that she should have had the wedding sooner cause then the drought might not have lasted as long. (she wasn't amused) It was to be an evening wedding. So, you can imagine how nail biting it was to have it still pouring late into the night on the 26th. Val was miserable that day. The whole thing was set to take place at the Cloisters: a beautiful castle-like structure set in the woods. The place was perfect for her. Problem was, they hadn't really planned for an indoor wedding. The reception was supposed to be inside but not the ceremony. We went to the Cloisters to develop a contingency plan. The place was gorgeous. And it can work for indoor stuff too. They have events all the time and are used to having to accomodate such things. Problem was, indoors is not what was planned and Val said that she could have chosen any number of other places if that was what had been wanted.
Let me make something clear: Val had not been your typically giddy bride. She was not looking forward to the whole shindig at all. Oh, she was looking forward to getting married but not to the rigamorole. And to be fair, she didn't have an easy time of it all. They may have met in Maryland but they planned most of it all long distance. She ended up in Huntsville, Alabama, earlier this year and has had to plan for several major life changes all at once. So, her being stressed was understandable. I just wish she had been happier about it all but the anticipation of the wedding just couldn't overcome all the other stuff.
Fortunately, the weather cleared by noon on the 27th. Us girls -- Val, me (MOH), Jessica (childhood friend), and Anne-Marie (work friend) -- trooped to the hair dressers and Val's spirits started to pick up. She got the normal nerves thing going on and everything but seemed in a much happier place. When we all got back to the hotel and were finally done up, she was doing much better. And oh, she made such a lovely bride. She'd chosen a beautiful lace sheath dress. She was simply stunning in it. When I get some pics, I'll post one. I figured that picture taking was the least of my responsibilities that day.
We all went to the Cloisters for the picture taking. Because it was an evening wedding, we had to do the pics beforehand. Ok, here's where things are a little complicated. Dale is Catholic but Valerie converted to Judaism (from Lutheran) about two years ago. So, the ceremony and stuff was actually Jewish. Because there's a part where Dale and her are together for the actual ceremony, him seeing her beforehand wasn't a big deal. So, that whole tradition of not seeing the bride before the wedding didn't matter.
The photographer was awesome. He did an amazing job of setting it all up. My favorite moment was when Dale got to see her for the first time. He had the properly stunned look on his face and she was giggling like a schoolgirl. It was like it was only the two of them around. Such a movie moment. One of the reasons being outside was so important was because the Cloisters has a windmill and Val so wanted the wedding party pics to be there. That was fun. After that came the family photos and the rest of us ended upstairs.
I'm sure I could have stayed downstairs to help but I thought that I would just be in the way. It was a tossup cause I know she wanted me to help keep her mom from driving her nuts but I didn't know how I could do that for the photo stuff. So, I just waited. Finally they all came upstairs.
All of the wedding party and immediate family gathered around in one of the rooms so that we could watch them sign the Jewish marriage agreement. It was a cool little part of the ceremony. Then came the aisle walking and all that jazz. I messed up a little with Val's train because I forgot that she needed me to hand it to her so she could walk around Dale three times at the beginning. I wanted to straighten it out pretty. lol It didn't seem to be a big deal. We hadn't had a rehearsal (just a verbal run through) so hopefully I'm forgiven. The rest went off pretty well. The only thing I felt the OCD need to tweak was when her veil went back. It didn't completely go straight on one side and I didn't want it to look goofy in the pictures so I quickly steeped up and tweaked it down straight. lol Val didn't even know I had done that til later.
The reception was very elegant: open bar, cheese, dessert. Very simple but beautifully done. My speech was impromptu and not the best thing in the world (bad speech teacher) but I wanted to go with the flow of the moment and emotion rather than something rehearsed. I had a few things planned but mostly I just went with the moment. Afterwards, Val danced with her father and also with Dale. It was the only dancing that happened. I thought maybe seeing her with her dad would make me feel sad since I won't be able to do that but it just made me smile. Besides, it's when I got to help her mom out so that was good. Her mom had done really well not to cry until then. It was sweet.
Overall, the wedding went off without any major snafus. There were minor things but it was an awesome event. Just as elegant as Val could have wished.
Saturday, November 17, 2007
End of the Hell Week
So, the week is almost finished and thank God. Mike and I went out for brunch and then to Petsmart to look at the cats cause I'm thinking that company for Shaman might be a good thing. Depends upon how she does in the next few weeks. Well, there were two groups there with dogs for adoptions as well (I had no idea it was such a big day there). One was the Greyhound Lifesavers group. Mike and I have been talking about getting a greyhound for a while. They so fit our lifestyle and personality. They were so beautiful and sweet. Hard to find a cat friendly one but we are going to try for that. They have new ones a lot so we may find a good mix. And Michael thinks that dog would be better than a cat. Less animosity. Um, ok. We'll see.
One thing Shaman is enjoying is full run of the house. We can open up every room now cause she sheds less than Miri did and doesn't yark in bad places. Sad, but true. I'd rather have Miri than all the doors open but. . .must take what benefit I can.
The week had to end on a down note thought. When we came out of Petsmart about 1:30, my car wouldn't start. The short version is that the started went bad and took the battery with it. Got the starter fixed at Sears and the battery replaced at Advanced Auto cause it was still under warranty from my purchase there last year. But it took all damn day to get the rest of this done. And to top it off, I walked around a the mall a little bit with a huge rip in the back of my pants near the pocket! (sigh)
Just freaking great. But it's almost over. I hurt from being on my feet too much but I'll survive.
One thing Shaman is enjoying is full run of the house. We can open up every room now cause she sheds less than Miri did and doesn't yark in bad places. Sad, but true. I'd rather have Miri than all the doors open but. . .must take what benefit I can.
The week had to end on a down note thought. When we came out of Petsmart about 1:30, my car wouldn't start. The short version is that the started went bad and took the battery with it. Got the starter fixed at Sears and the battery replaced at Advanced Auto cause it was still under warranty from my purchase there last year. But it took all damn day to get the rest of this done. And to top it off, I walked around a the mall a little bit with a huge rip in the back of my pants near the pocket! (sigh)
Just freaking great. But it's almost over. I hurt from being on my feet too much but I'll survive.
Wednesday, November 14, 2007
Goodbye, My Sweeting
It has just not been a good week as you know. Well, today it got worse. Miriamele got sick again over the weekend but we didn't know how badly until yesterday when we saw that she had thrown up all over the place. She'd stopped eating (I just thought less) but was still drinking her water. I hadn't been able to give her her medication over the weekend but that shouldn't have affected her that much. It didn't. Seems that along with the hyperthyroidism she must have had kidney problems. When she was tested in June, they looked ok but that could have been because the urinalysis was done with diluted urine. Or it just could have been at the early stages and she deteriorated quickly. Either way, her symptoms were so close to the hyperthyroidal ones that it just seemed to be that.
This morning she could barely move so I took Miri to the vet right away. Went to Petsmart this time because our vet is closed on Wednesdays and one of the vets there is a regular at the bookstore. We didn't see him but another doctor who was very good. They couldn't get a urine sample because she was just too dehydrated. There was nothing in her system. Probably because every time she drank, she threw up. I mean, I'd cleaned up the kitchen last week and now it looks almost the same because she went on a yarking spree. Anyway, they took blood samples and everything pointed to kidney problems -- possibly renal failure but it was hard to tell since they couldn't get a urinalysis and forcing fluids into her would only dilute the results (like in June). To the doctor, Miri's kidneys felt way too small and from my description of her health for the past few months, it sounded to him like they were deteriorating. He couldn't guarantee me that was what was going on but it pretty well fit the bill for her. So, I had two choices (three if you count inaction as one): 1) they could pump Miri full of fluids and get her back up to health to the point where I would have to regularly give her fluids via IV (which would increase in frequency as time went on) until they shut down totally or 2) I could put her to sleep. He didn't actually say the latter but I was pretty quick on reading between the lines with how he described the first process. Because, basically it came down to that or a kidney transplant.
It sounded like we would just be prolonging Miri's illness. And to what purpose? The fluid IVs are fairly easy to do (he said) but given that she hated me just giving her a pill, I can't imagine what she would have done with IVs. She would have been miserable. And it wasn't a cure, just a patch. I couldn't do that to her. But I felt so horrible because I thought it looked like I was going to choose an "easy" way out. But the doc told me about a cat who'd been in earlier to be euthanized. The cat was older than Miri and hyperthyroidal but otherwise completely healthy. Awesome kidney functions and he refused to euthanize the cat. I admired him for that. But with Miri, it was definitely an option. He didn't push it on me and would have respected my wishes but I knew. I couldn't put her through months of torture (not pain but emotional torture) just because I didn't want to lose her. Lately I've been frustrated with the yarking and the shedding and all that but I didn't want her to do die to solve it. And money wasn't even an issue cause Mike is ok with whatever I need to do for them. So, I would have chosen anything but putting her down if it meant that she might have a chance of being cured. But she didn't. My beautiful little princess was just too ill to help.
So, I did the humane thing and chose the time of her death for her. I couldn't watch so they did it in another room. Afterwards the doctor had more solid words of comfort because he said that she went quietly and quickly. He hadn't even put all of the medicine in her before she passed away. Her body was just that toxic that there wasn't much left. I just wished I'd known that and been more aware these past few days so I could have held her more. That's where I have regret. That she was sick and I didn't realize how much sooner. Yeah, I know I've been legitimately out of it but. . .(sigh).
Hopefully this is the last bad thing for the week. Hell, for the rest of the year. I'm sick and tired of it all. But here are pictures of Miriamele:
Miri was lovely, wasn't she? So regal with her "painted" eyes. Very much a lady. She was always ready to lend comfort when someone was upset. Remember, Michelle? I will always remember why she came with me to SC. She was afraid of everyone but me. Three days before I was to come down, I woke up and found her curled against my chest and arm. How could I leave that sweet face behind? Obviously, I couldn't so I tried to give her a better life than she would have had at the farm. There were times when she drove me bonkers (remember when she went into heat, Andi, before she was fixed?) and I developed an allergy to her fur, but she was a wonderful cat. The house is going to be a lot more empty without her around. Shaman is the only one left from that litter and the three of us are going to miss Miriamele's voice from now on.
This morning she could barely move so I took Miri to the vet right away. Went to Petsmart this time because our vet is closed on Wednesdays and one of the vets there is a regular at the bookstore. We didn't see him but another doctor who was very good. They couldn't get a urine sample because she was just too dehydrated. There was nothing in her system. Probably because every time she drank, she threw up. I mean, I'd cleaned up the kitchen last week and now it looks almost the same because she went on a yarking spree. Anyway, they took blood samples and everything pointed to kidney problems -- possibly renal failure but it was hard to tell since they couldn't get a urinalysis and forcing fluids into her would only dilute the results (like in June). To the doctor, Miri's kidneys felt way too small and from my description of her health for the past few months, it sounded to him like they were deteriorating. He couldn't guarantee me that was what was going on but it pretty well fit the bill for her. So, I had two choices (three if you count inaction as one): 1) they could pump Miri full of fluids and get her back up to health to the point where I would have to regularly give her fluids via IV (which would increase in frequency as time went on) until they shut down totally or 2) I could put her to sleep. He didn't actually say the latter but I was pretty quick on reading between the lines with how he described the first process. Because, basically it came down to that or a kidney transplant.
It sounded like we would just be prolonging Miri's illness. And to what purpose? The fluid IVs are fairly easy to do (he said) but given that she hated me just giving her a pill, I can't imagine what she would have done with IVs. She would have been miserable. And it wasn't a cure, just a patch. I couldn't do that to her. But I felt so horrible because I thought it looked like I was going to choose an "easy" way out. But the doc told me about a cat who'd been in earlier to be euthanized. The cat was older than Miri and hyperthyroidal but otherwise completely healthy. Awesome kidney functions and he refused to euthanize the cat. I admired him for that. But with Miri, it was definitely an option. He didn't push it on me and would have respected my wishes but I knew. I couldn't put her through months of torture (not pain but emotional torture) just because I didn't want to lose her. Lately I've been frustrated with the yarking and the shedding and all that but I didn't want her to do die to solve it. And money wasn't even an issue cause Mike is ok with whatever I need to do for them. So, I would have chosen anything but putting her down if it meant that she might have a chance of being cured. But she didn't. My beautiful little princess was just too ill to help.
So, I did the humane thing and chose the time of her death for her. I couldn't watch so they did it in another room. Afterwards the doctor had more solid words of comfort because he said that she went quietly and quickly. He hadn't even put all of the medicine in her before she passed away. Her body was just that toxic that there wasn't much left. I just wished I'd known that and been more aware these past few days so I could have held her more. That's where I have regret. That she was sick and I didn't realize how much sooner. Yeah, I know I've been legitimately out of it but. . .(sigh).
Hopefully this is the last bad thing for the week. Hell, for the rest of the year. I'm sick and tired of it all. But here are pictures of Miriamele:
Miri was lovely, wasn't she? So regal with her "painted" eyes. Very much a lady. She was always ready to lend comfort when someone was upset. Remember, Michelle? I will always remember why she came with me to SC. She was afraid of everyone but me. Three days before I was to come down, I woke up and found her curled against my chest and arm. How could I leave that sweet face behind? Obviously, I couldn't so I tried to give her a better life than she would have had at the farm. There were times when she drove me bonkers (remember when she went into heat, Andi, before she was fixed?) and I developed an allergy to her fur, but she was a wonderful cat. The house is going to be a lot more empty without her around. Shaman is the only one left from that litter and the three of us are going to miss Miriamele's voice from now on.
Tuesday, November 13, 2007
This Is Recuperating?
(sigh) It's my own fault. I admit it. I'm supposed to be resting and getting better but instead I am allowing myself to get stressed out. I was in a fairly good mood until yesterday. I mean, I am sad about my aunt and everything but I wasn't stressed. Now I'm stressed. I'm still "resting" in the sense that I am pretty much immobile in my chair or in bed but my brain is doing anything but. I'd sleep but then the more I sleep the more restless energy I have. Which is probably why my OCD is kicking in.
What's stressing me out? Work. There's some drama going on that really isn't necessary and people are just all worn out and griping. Ok, well, not maybe people plural so much as one person. But not being there, I have no idea what's going on. I've been fighting to get the job (though God knows why) and they still haven't made a decision yet. The manager meetings went well a few weeks ago and stuff and I had my interview with the new DM after that but it's dragging. I had a final interview two weeks ago with HR. But I hurt myself in that one with one of the questions.
See, the other store in Columbia needs a manager too. However, unlike with me, they have not officially made the assistant manager the acting/interim manager even though he is running things. So, they are looking to fill both stores and supposedly there are a bunch of qualified candidates. Well, I was asked if I would consider managing the other store if that is something that they felt would be best done. I said no. Not quite that flat out but I gave my reasons: I don't like that mall. It's not safe (and that is not an exaggeration when stabbings and shootings happen) and I haven't shopped there in years. Well, this didn't sit well. Especially with the new DM who said it makes it seem like we should tell our customers not to shop there and that she should be afraid to go there. Well, yeah. So, that was a strike against me. It's also a strike against me that I have personal ties with the people at the store. Uh, duh. But why send out an email saying that we could hire friends and family and then hold that against me? They are making an issue out of thin air because that is not even a problem. Hell, I don't have time to hang out with anyone as just friends outside the store. As Jon pointed out, even when we do get a chance to grab a bite to eat, we end up talking about work. And hello, you can't tell me that other managers aren't friends with some of their employees. It's a crock of horseshit.
I really love my job but corporate is making this way harder than it needs to be. I have kept everything running fairly well. Has it been perfect? No. Have we been doing at least as well as everyone else? Yeah. And even better than that too. I was told that we should know something later this week about the position. Good, cause I need to know what my options are gonna be. I've been planning my life around this job for the past four months (I got an apology for having had to have been in the position for so long without an answer) and if I haven't proven myself by now, I never will to them. They can drag their feet if they want to. I'll just keep doing what I'm doing until I know otherwise. And then? Well, guess it depends on what is said and offered.
What's stressing me out? Work. There's some drama going on that really isn't necessary and people are just all worn out and griping. Ok, well, not maybe people plural so much as one person. But not being there, I have no idea what's going on. I've been fighting to get the job (though God knows why) and they still haven't made a decision yet. The manager meetings went well a few weeks ago and stuff and I had my interview with the new DM after that but it's dragging. I had a final interview two weeks ago with HR. But I hurt myself in that one with one of the questions.
See, the other store in Columbia needs a manager too. However, unlike with me, they have not officially made the assistant manager the acting/interim manager even though he is running things. So, they are looking to fill both stores and supposedly there are a bunch of qualified candidates. Well, I was asked if I would consider managing the other store if that is something that they felt would be best done. I said no. Not quite that flat out but I gave my reasons: I don't like that mall. It's not safe (and that is not an exaggeration when stabbings and shootings happen) and I haven't shopped there in years. Well, this didn't sit well. Especially with the new DM who said it makes it seem like we should tell our customers not to shop there and that she should be afraid to go there. Well, yeah. So, that was a strike against me. It's also a strike against me that I have personal ties with the people at the store. Uh, duh. But why send out an email saying that we could hire friends and family and then hold that against me? They are making an issue out of thin air because that is not even a problem. Hell, I don't have time to hang out with anyone as just friends outside the store. As Jon pointed out, even when we do get a chance to grab a bite to eat, we end up talking about work. And hello, you can't tell me that other managers aren't friends with some of their employees. It's a crock of horseshit.
I really love my job but corporate is making this way harder than it needs to be. I have kept everything running fairly well. Has it been perfect? No. Have we been doing at least as well as everyone else? Yeah. And even better than that too. I was told that we should know something later this week about the position. Good, cause I need to know what my options are gonna be. I've been planning my life around this job for the past four months (I got an apology for having had to have been in the position for so long without an answer) and if I haven't proven myself by now, I never will to them. They can drag their feet if they want to. I'll just keep doing what I'm doing until I know otherwise. And then? Well, guess it depends on what is said and offered.
Monday, November 12, 2007
Rest In Peace
It's another one of those days. I didn't sleep very well last night because of the pain. So, I slept in and when I awoke, I found a message on my cellphone from my brother, Chuck, that Sissy (our aunt) had died this morning. I must say that it was a shock and not a shock at the same time. The shock part came from the fact that I didn't think that she'd been that ill. The not a shock was because she hasn't wanted to be alive for a long time. She broke her hip about a month or so ago and ended up back in the hospital for something else. I'd tried calling but no one would answer. I hadn't had time to call Karen (my brother's widow who was there all the time) for details but Chuck let me know pretty well. Apparently Sissy wasn't answering the phone. (sigh)
Sissy was my father's older sister and in her mid-80s. She'd been depressed for quite a long time and also losing her memory. Not sure if it was senility or Alzheimer's but she was getting worse and worse at holding conversations. At least now she is where she wanted to be. . .with Uncle. It's sad. But at the same time also a relief. There wasn't much we could do to make her happy.
I don't have any particulars yet on the funeral. She'd set everything up years ago so we wouldn't have to worry about that. The problem is, Mike has to work all week doing installs and I am basically laid up from the surgery. So, I don't know what I'm going to do. I should go home for the funeral but I honestly don't know if I can drive. I am not supposed to for a few days because of the meds. I guess I will wait and see what is going on when and stuff. My other brother, John, is supposed to keep me up to speed. So, if he does, and Chuck comes home, we'll see. Once I know everything, I'll contact the doctor. Familial duty versus health. (sigh)
Sissy was my father's older sister and in her mid-80s. She'd been depressed for quite a long time and also losing her memory. Not sure if it was senility or Alzheimer's but she was getting worse and worse at holding conversations. At least now she is where she wanted to be. . .with Uncle. It's sad. But at the same time also a relief. There wasn't much we could do to make her happy.
I don't have any particulars yet on the funeral. She'd set everything up years ago so we wouldn't have to worry about that. The problem is, Mike has to work all week doing installs and I am basically laid up from the surgery. So, I don't know what I'm going to do. I should go home for the funeral but I honestly don't know if I can drive. I am not supposed to for a few days because of the meds. I guess I will wait and see what is going on when and stuff. My other brother, John, is supposed to keep me up to speed. So, if he does, and Chuck comes home, we'll see. Once I know everything, I'll contact the doctor. Familial duty versus health. (sigh)
Sunday, November 11, 2007
Ouch
So, it's done. I am now a sporting model as I've heard it. On Wednesday I went and had blood work done. The idiot who did it bruised my right arm up pretty good. When I told her that it hurt coming out too, her response was, "Everyone says that." Yeah, cause she's an idiot. Despite my fair skin, I don't usually bruise unless they do something wrong. I spent most of last week trying to get stuff done before the surgery on Friday.
Mike and I woke up about 8a on Friday morning and just cuddled for an hour. I so didn't want to go to the hospital. We got there on time. Surprisingly, my blood pressure was pretty normal. I was nervous as all hell until they finally got the IV in me. I hate those things the most. I got tired of being asked about my diabetes when I don't have it. Just because I'm on a diabetic medicine doesn't mean I have the disease. I'm on it for the PCOS. In fact, when they tested my blood sugar, it was a great level. So, yeah, that's not one of my problems.
The nurses and doctors were all very nice. Once they gave me the relaxing drugs, my memory is fuzzy. I remember getting in and kind of fighting the oxygen mask but once I was out, I was out. Fortunately, I don't remember the breathing tube being taken out. Last time, I gagged on it. The pain wasn't as bad as when I had my gall bladder out (13 years ago). Dr. Giudice got the air out of me pretty well. They did give me good drugs for what pain I had (which was a decent amount). For the most part, I kept falling back to sleep.
I drank a little ginger ale but it tasted icky so I later switched to diet coke. But neither sat well in my stomach so they had to give me something for the nausea. I remember being taken to the transition room and seeing Michael again. Some nurses helped me get dressed. That was fun. Then I got the IV out (didn't feel that for once) and put in a wheel chair. The whole process only took from 10a to 5p (surgery wasn't much more than an hour with no complications). I was so damn groggy that there are gaps in my consciousness. I do remember the bumps in the hall which made my stomach go erk. And the speed bumps coming out of the parking garage. Mike says that they need to rethink those.
We got home and I went to the bathroom and allowed myself to throw up. I hadn't done it at the hospital because I was afraid they'd keep me. But I felt better afterwards. I went to bed and Michael curled up next to me. We both slept until about 10p when Jon called to see what was going on. And I made him call his mom. At 1a we woke up again and he made me some waffles (light on butter and syrup). They were yummy. I think I ended up in my office about 4or 5a cause laying flat was hurting too much. Thank God I bought the recliner over the summer. It is helping a lot.
We got up about 9a yesterday. I kept drifting in and out but finally managed to keep myself awake by playing golf with Mike. He's done a really good job of taking care of me. He told me that I have a free two week bitch pass. I asked if I could raincheck on the time I don't use. lol And that I am not allowed to do anything but rest. Yeah, we'll see how that one goes. I've already checked in with work to make sure they do a few of the things I forgot to do. lol You can force my body to rest but there is no guarantee that my mind will.
Seriously though, I am enjoying being taken care of for once. Usually it irks me to be disabled but I am going to do as I am told so that I don't get worse. But it isn't as bad as I expected. Not much worse than my most painful monthlies. So, I guess those were prep for this. Besides, they gave me good drugs. Dr. Giudice did well with the incisions. They are neat and small. Both are in the same spots as old ones -- my belly button and lower end of my appendix scar. And they are sealed over with the liquid bandage stuff. The only icky looking thing is my right temple. I look like I have a gunshot wound from where he removed my big mole. I had him remove four -- the one under my arm that had been turning black, the temple one that has been slowly getting bigger, a tag one on the corner of my right eyelid (I didn't like it being so close to my eye) and a big one on my back that was bothering Michael. None were for vanity. Hopefully they all turn out benign though Dr. Giudice didn't mention testing them.
Michael has gone to help at the store cause we have another 100+ boxes and Jon can't lift things because of his shoulder. We have permission for Mike to work since I'm out. So, at least we get to pay him for his time now. lol I tried sleeping but couldn't really. So, I thought I would update you all. I plan on being a vegetable physically but getting work done. I have so much to do. This is what I get for wishing for time to work on it all. lol
Mike and I woke up about 8a on Friday morning and just cuddled for an hour. I so didn't want to go to the hospital. We got there on time. Surprisingly, my blood pressure was pretty normal. I was nervous as all hell until they finally got the IV in me. I hate those things the most. I got tired of being asked about my diabetes when I don't have it. Just because I'm on a diabetic medicine doesn't mean I have the disease. I'm on it for the PCOS. In fact, when they tested my blood sugar, it was a great level. So, yeah, that's not one of my problems.
The nurses and doctors were all very nice. Once they gave me the relaxing drugs, my memory is fuzzy. I remember getting in and kind of fighting the oxygen mask but once I was out, I was out. Fortunately, I don't remember the breathing tube being taken out. Last time, I gagged on it. The pain wasn't as bad as when I had my gall bladder out (13 years ago). Dr. Giudice got the air out of me pretty well. They did give me good drugs for what pain I had (which was a decent amount). For the most part, I kept falling back to sleep.
I drank a little ginger ale but it tasted icky so I later switched to diet coke. But neither sat well in my stomach so they had to give me something for the nausea. I remember being taken to the transition room and seeing Michael again. Some nurses helped me get dressed. That was fun. Then I got the IV out (didn't feel that for once) and put in a wheel chair. The whole process only took from 10a to 5p (surgery wasn't much more than an hour with no complications). I was so damn groggy that there are gaps in my consciousness. I do remember the bumps in the hall which made my stomach go erk. And the speed bumps coming out of the parking garage. Mike says that they need to rethink those.
We got home and I went to the bathroom and allowed myself to throw up. I hadn't done it at the hospital because I was afraid they'd keep me. But I felt better afterwards. I went to bed and Michael curled up next to me. We both slept until about 10p when Jon called to see what was going on. And I made him call his mom. At 1a we woke up again and he made me some waffles (light on butter and syrup). They were yummy. I think I ended up in my office about 4or 5a cause laying flat was hurting too much. Thank God I bought the recliner over the summer. It is helping a lot.
We got up about 9a yesterday. I kept drifting in and out but finally managed to keep myself awake by playing golf with Mike. He's done a really good job of taking care of me. He told me that I have a free two week bitch pass. I asked if I could raincheck on the time I don't use. lol And that I am not allowed to do anything but rest. Yeah, we'll see how that one goes. I've already checked in with work to make sure they do a few of the things I forgot to do. lol You can force my body to rest but there is no guarantee that my mind will.
Seriously though, I am enjoying being taken care of for once. Usually it irks me to be disabled but I am going to do as I am told so that I don't get worse. But it isn't as bad as I expected. Not much worse than my most painful monthlies. So, I guess those were prep for this. Besides, they gave me good drugs. Dr. Giudice did well with the incisions. They are neat and small. Both are in the same spots as old ones -- my belly button and lower end of my appendix scar. And they are sealed over with the liquid bandage stuff. The only icky looking thing is my right temple. I look like I have a gunshot wound from where he removed my big mole. I had him remove four -- the one under my arm that had been turning black, the temple one that has been slowly getting bigger, a tag one on the corner of my right eyelid (I didn't like it being so close to my eye) and a big one on my back that was bothering Michael. None were for vanity. Hopefully they all turn out benign though Dr. Giudice didn't mention testing them.
Michael has gone to help at the store cause we have another 100+ boxes and Jon can't lift things because of his shoulder. We have permission for Mike to work since I'm out. So, at least we get to pay him for his time now. lol I tried sleeping but couldn't really. So, I thought I would update you all. I plan on being a vegetable physically but getting work done. I have so much to do. This is what I get for wishing for time to work on it all. lol
Saturday, November 03, 2007
Health Update
Well, I'm going to have time to catch up on news pretty soon. This coming Friday (9th) I go in for outpatient surgery. Michael went with me to see the new doctor (Guidices -- he's very nice) yesterday. Well, it looks like the endometrial ablation isn't necessarily the best choice for someone like me. See, it does stop the monthly bleeding in 75% of patients with the other 25% having spotting. Gee, with my luck, which % would I probably be? Also, it doesn't cause infertility so there would still be a likelihood that I could get pregnant. That would be bad because with out the endometrial lining, there are all sorts of problems for the fetus. So, they normally tie a woman's tubes when doing the procedure. This also wouldn't eliminate the possibility of uterine cancer which is a high risk for someone like me who has PCOS (add in my maternal grandmother dying of ovarian cancer and father of colon cancer and we can say uber odds). AND, 1 in 5 women who have the procedure eventually have to have a hysterectomy.
So, we decided that I should just eliminate most of that worry and just have the partial hysterectomy done now. I get to keep my ovaries and cervix (so I won't need hormones, etc) but I lose the uterus. They do it all the time with laproscopic surgery and the recovery time is pretty quick (1-2 weeks).
Actually, they wanted me to do it the Friday BEFORE Thanksgiving because while Dr. Guicides has an opening, the hospital did not before then. I was like, "Oh my God, no! I have to work that week! I can't not work black Friday and the weekend." So, the appointment woman (who was very nice) spoke with the doctor and they fit me in next Friday. I have to go to see him on Wednesday to discuss everything. I'm also going to have him remove a few of the questionable moles I have. Especially one on my right arm because it has black spots now. He said it would be easy to do. He also said that they could do a procedure that should help with the PCOS symptoms so that I may be able to lose weight better. That would be awesome. And we're going to up my dosage of Metformin cause it just isn't working at this level.
I've already given everyone at work a heads up. The new DM was like, "Are you going to use your vacation time for this? Make sure that you have all of your ducks in a row." What does she think I am? A moron? Believe me, if I could put this off longer, I would. It's not like I've been planning to be sick right now. In fact, since I've been off of the progesterone and not having a wonky cycle, I feel better. But I know it won;t last if I don't fix it. So, I'm a little annoyed at the statement. My reasonable side says that she's just doing her job but the rest of me is like, "Do you know how much of my life is invested in that store?" Good God. I haven't spent an entire day away from there when I'm in Columbia for weeks now. Sheesh.
Anyway, I will keep you all up to date as things happen. This surgery should be fairly routine unless something else has popped up. I have so much to do before Friday that it isn't even funny.
Gotta run and eat dinner. Hugs to all.
So, we decided that I should just eliminate most of that worry and just have the partial hysterectomy done now. I get to keep my ovaries and cervix (so I won't need hormones, etc) but I lose the uterus. They do it all the time with laproscopic surgery and the recovery time is pretty quick (1-2 weeks).
Actually, they wanted me to do it the Friday BEFORE Thanksgiving because while Dr. Guicides has an opening, the hospital did not before then. I was like, "Oh my God, no! I have to work that week! I can't not work black Friday and the weekend." So, the appointment woman (who was very nice) spoke with the doctor and they fit me in next Friday. I have to go to see him on Wednesday to discuss everything. I'm also going to have him remove a few of the questionable moles I have. Especially one on my right arm because it has black spots now. He said it would be easy to do. He also said that they could do a procedure that should help with the PCOS symptoms so that I may be able to lose weight better. That would be awesome. And we're going to up my dosage of Metformin cause it just isn't working at this level.
I've already given everyone at work a heads up. The new DM was like, "Are you going to use your vacation time for this? Make sure that you have all of your ducks in a row." What does she think I am? A moron? Believe me, if I could put this off longer, I would. It's not like I've been planning to be sick right now. In fact, since I've been off of the progesterone and not having a wonky cycle, I feel better. But I know it won;t last if I don't fix it. So, I'm a little annoyed at the statement. My reasonable side says that she's just doing her job but the rest of me is like, "Do you know how much of my life is invested in that store?" Good God. I haven't spent an entire day away from there when I'm in Columbia for weeks now. Sheesh.
Anyway, I will keep you all up to date as things happen. This surgery should be fairly routine unless something else has popped up. I have so much to do before Friday that it isn't even funny.
Gotta run and eat dinner. Hugs to all.
Tuesday, October 30, 2007
A Moment of Silence
There were a few things that I wanted to catch you all up on but I need to put that off for a moment. Some of you may have heard about the NC beach house blaze that took place early Sunday morning. Thirteen SC students were staying at the house. Six escaped while seven lost their lives. Of the seven, six were at USC. And one was a current student of mine, Justin Anderson:
He was in my TTH 2p class. I did not know anything about the accident until I got to class today. In fact, the authorities only just confirmed the identities of the dead even though the university knew for sure from other sources. He was a nice guy and his classmates are all in shock. One poor girl knew him and two others because she is in the same sorority as the girls who were there. You can imagine the faces I saw today. I thought that they were just unusually quiet. And no, we didn't have class for long. Some of my other students know either other victims or survivors. You can bet they have free reign this week.
It saddens me greatly. . .to think that they died so terribly. It's going to be odd not seeing him in class but I haven't had time to get to know many of my students well this semester. Well enough to feel the extra pain of their loss because I know them but not so much that I can't truly stop my life for mourning. And that may be the most painful thing of all for me.
My heart does go out to their parents, friends, and families. Especially those who survived the fire because they have a long road ahead of them. I am proud of USC for responding so quickly to the situation and for aiding everyone. They truly do care and I've seen it many times that they aren't all about the money. So, please join us in a moment of silence and wish everyone left behind well. Because they are the ones who need it most now as those, like my student, who have left are beyond care for this earthly world.
He was in my TTH 2p class. I did not know anything about the accident until I got to class today. In fact, the authorities only just confirmed the identities of the dead even though the university knew for sure from other sources. He was a nice guy and his classmates are all in shock. One poor girl knew him and two others because she is in the same sorority as the girls who were there. You can imagine the faces I saw today. I thought that they were just unusually quiet. And no, we didn't have class for long. Some of my other students know either other victims or survivors. You can bet they have free reign this week.
It saddens me greatly. . .to think that they died so terribly. It's going to be odd not seeing him in class but I haven't had time to get to know many of my students well this semester. Well enough to feel the extra pain of their loss because I know them but not so much that I can't truly stop my life for mourning. And that may be the most painful thing of all for me.
My heart does go out to their parents, friends, and families. Especially those who survived the fire because they have a long road ahead of them. I am proud of USC for responding so quickly to the situation and for aiding everyone. They truly do care and I've seen it many times that they aren't all about the money. So, please join us in a moment of silence and wish everyone left behind well. Because they are the ones who need it most now as those, like my student, who have left are beyond care for this earthly world.
Thursday, October 11, 2007
Never Ending
So, life has been rather hectic of late. The store seems to be in a never ending state of catching up because we are getting increasingly large shipments (another hundred boxes on the 28th, 123 last week, and 156 expected tomorrow). On top of that, we have a massive returns list to do which was wrong the first time so we had to wait an extra week to get the update. We have so much product that we are having to shelve and scan at the same time. Sheesh But the good thing is that we are getting it together and everyone seems happy with work. The kiosk looks great and our liaison is happy with that.
I had been told that I wasn't going to the manager's meeting next week. Mainly I think it's because I am not the official manager. I felt that I should go simply because no matter what they decide, someone from the store should know what's being planned this year. But no. Well, at least until last Friday when I got a call asking if it was too late for me to make arrangements to go. Turns out the new DM wants to meet me and do an interview. Be careful what you wish for. So, I'll be flying up to Pittsburgh on Monday. I find it hilarious that this city was chosen since that's where I was "transferred" over the summer.
Classes have been doing well so that's good.
The major glitch in all of this is that I have been having major female probs again. I was in so much pain this past week that I came home and drugged out almost every night. I already had another doctor appointment set up for this morning. Well, Julie doesn't know what to do for me so she passed me on to a new doctor. Basically, he confirmed things I've known for a long time: I have PCOS and I don't ovulate. Duh The former I was told at age 20 and the latter I assumed since I'm not "normal" without the Pill (even though I had a doctor say otherwise). I can't be given an estrogen based pill because a major study last year gave strong evidence that increased levels of the hormone can cause stroke. So, anyone with migraines who get additives (like my aura visions at the end of last year/beginning of this one) cannot be prescribed the stuff. So, I am stuck with progesterone only meds which are obviously not working since that is what I have been on since May. My health has been slowly deteriorating with that stuff. So I am off it.
What are my options?
1) Try one more time with a different kind of natural progesterone pill.
(I doubt this will work since the last didn't.)
2) Go in and have a endometrial ablation. This is where they cauterize the uterus so that there is no more bleeding.
(This basically sterilizes me too.)
3) Have a hysterectomy to remove the uterus.
(Hell no unless I have a choice.)
No matter what I choose, I need to have a endometrial biopsy to see if I have endometriosis or worse.
Mike and I have discussed it and I am going for option #2. It's the lest of where I will eventually end up so I might as well get it over with. I'm not happy with this option. I mean, I know we say we don't want children but a part of me would really like to meet the person we could create together. I've known for years that this might not be possible. But at least there was hope should I want it. Now, no hope. (sigh) We don't have the time or lifestyle for a child right now and by the time we may have. . .well, I might be too old for natural anyway.
Not sure when this will happen. The procedure only puts me out of commission for about 3-4 days. So, I am going to shoot for the beginning of November after Val's wedding. It's the best I can do. I'll keep you posted.
I had been told that I wasn't going to the manager's meeting next week. Mainly I think it's because I am not the official manager. I felt that I should go simply because no matter what they decide, someone from the store should know what's being planned this year. But no. Well, at least until last Friday when I got a call asking if it was too late for me to make arrangements to go. Turns out the new DM wants to meet me and do an interview. Be careful what you wish for. So, I'll be flying up to Pittsburgh on Monday. I find it hilarious that this city was chosen since that's where I was "transferred" over the summer.
Classes have been doing well so that's good.
The major glitch in all of this is that I have been having major female probs again. I was in so much pain this past week that I came home and drugged out almost every night. I already had another doctor appointment set up for this morning. Well, Julie doesn't know what to do for me so she passed me on to a new doctor. Basically, he confirmed things I've known for a long time: I have PCOS and I don't ovulate. Duh The former I was told at age 20 and the latter I assumed since I'm not "normal" without the Pill (even though I had a doctor say otherwise). I can't be given an estrogen based pill because a major study last year gave strong evidence that increased levels of the hormone can cause stroke. So, anyone with migraines who get additives (like my aura visions at the end of last year/beginning of this one) cannot be prescribed the stuff. So, I am stuck with progesterone only meds which are obviously not working since that is what I have been on since May. My health has been slowly deteriorating with that stuff. So I am off it.
What are my options?
1) Try one more time with a different kind of natural progesterone pill.
(I doubt this will work since the last didn't.)
2) Go in and have a endometrial ablation. This is where they cauterize the uterus so that there is no more bleeding.
(This basically sterilizes me too.)
3) Have a hysterectomy to remove the uterus.
(Hell no unless I have a choice.)
No matter what I choose, I need to have a endometrial biopsy to see if I have endometriosis or worse.
Mike and I have discussed it and I am going for option #2. It's the lest of where I will eventually end up so I might as well get it over with. I'm not happy with this option. I mean, I know we say we don't want children but a part of me would really like to meet the person we could create together. I've known for years that this might not be possible. But at least there was hope should I want it. Now, no hope. (sigh) We don't have the time or lifestyle for a child right now and by the time we may have. . .well, I might be too old for natural anyway.
Not sure when this will happen. The procedure only puts me out of commission for about 3-4 days. So, I am going to shoot for the beginning of November after Val's wedding. It's the best I can do. I'll keep you posted.
Friday, September 28, 2007
What a Week
Yeah, I'm up really early again. I've actually been up since a little after 6a but was working on paying the current round of bills. (sigh) That never ends, does it? You see a nice chunk of money in your account and as you pay stuff, it slowly goes poof before your eyes. And just when you think you might have a little extra. . .it is just enough to get you to the next paycheck. Well, this time it was mostly because my car insurance is due and I had a few extraneous extra bills to pay (like for my last ultrasound). Ah, well, c'est la vie.
Monday was fun. The shipment ended up being 100 boxes. Oh joy. I went in after class at 10p and worked on them until 2a so that all of the street dates could get out. It was a huge day. I managed to get them done and do the romance stuff so the regulars could get them. Fortunately, I asked and received some extra hours from higher up so that we can make up for the fubar.
I meant to write on Tuesday but got very busy. It was Jami's and mine birthday. She spent it with my family. lol Odd, no? I woke up feeling blech. Had an early appointment with my therapist who made me promise to do something nice for myself since it didn't seem that I would get to do anything fun. Mike had to go up to Richmond, VA, so he had left before the crack of dawn and wasn't planning on being back until really late. (sigh) So, after making calls to our regular customers about all the new stuff, I headed to one of my favorite stores It's the place that has all the Celtic, etc stuff. If you are ever stuck for a gift idea, just get me a certificate to there. Here's the link: It's All in the Name. I treated myself to another Nene Thomas print:
She's pretty. Now I just have to get her framed. I also talked with the owner about teaming up for events. That way they have someone to help them out with stuff and we (the store) get out more to make sales. I'll keep you posted with that.
When I got to my office, I called Jami cause she had said to the night before. See, I texted her just after midnight while I was at the store to wish her a Happy Bday but didn't get her response until 2a. I had assumed she'd be asleep. Well, since she was at the farm, she was still up. And it turned out that Sissy (my aunt) was in the hospital again because she broke her hip. (sigh) So, Sissy was supposed to have surgery but it was put off a little because her blood pressure was too high. I mean, she is in her 80s so. . .I can imagine she's stressed. I'm not going to bore you with the family drama details that ensued but it wasn't a fun day for anyone.
After classes while I was doing my office hours, I talked with Jonathan and he insisted on taking me out to dinner. I didn't really want to go cause I was in a funk but I'm glad I did. We had a nice dinner and it cheered me up. (smile) I had also gone to the bookstore to buy some kid's books for an event at a local school. I felt bad because we hadn't gotten many donations. But we actually had stuff to give them anyway so it was all good.
Anyway, after dinner I came home and waited for Michael. He got home about 10p and brought me a bouquet of red roses, a balloon, and a card. It was very sweet. I actually hadn't expected anything. And the funniest part is that my therapist said that I should tell him to do such things more often since such gestures mean a lot to us girls. lol She'll be happy when I tell her he did it unprompted. She said it cause I wasn't expecting anything since we had gone to AWA and last year I waited until October to celebrate. And you know we girls like the romantic stuff. lol
Actually, Michael did get me more than that but I'll post them in another blog later since this one is really long. And I need to grab some breakfast. Hugs.
Monday was fun. The shipment ended up being 100 boxes. Oh joy. I went in after class at 10p and worked on them until 2a so that all of the street dates could get out. It was a huge day. I managed to get them done and do the romance stuff so the regulars could get them. Fortunately, I asked and received some extra hours from higher up so that we can make up for the fubar.
I meant to write on Tuesday but got very busy. It was Jami's and mine birthday. She spent it with my family. lol Odd, no? I woke up feeling blech. Had an early appointment with my therapist who made me promise to do something nice for myself since it didn't seem that I would get to do anything fun. Mike had to go up to Richmond, VA, so he had left before the crack of dawn and wasn't planning on being back until really late. (sigh) So, after making calls to our regular customers about all the new stuff, I headed to one of my favorite stores It's the place that has all the Celtic, etc stuff. If you are ever stuck for a gift idea, just get me a certificate to there. Here's the link: It's All in the Name. I treated myself to another Nene Thomas print:
She's pretty. Now I just have to get her framed. I also talked with the owner about teaming up for events. That way they have someone to help them out with stuff and we (the store) get out more to make sales. I'll keep you posted with that.
When I got to my office, I called Jami cause she had said to the night before. See, I texted her just after midnight while I was at the store to wish her a Happy Bday but didn't get her response until 2a. I had assumed she'd be asleep. Well, since she was at the farm, she was still up. And it turned out that Sissy (my aunt) was in the hospital again because she broke her hip. (sigh) So, Sissy was supposed to have surgery but it was put off a little because her blood pressure was too high. I mean, she is in her 80s so. . .I can imagine she's stressed. I'm not going to bore you with the family drama details that ensued but it wasn't a fun day for anyone.
After classes while I was doing my office hours, I talked with Jonathan and he insisted on taking me out to dinner. I didn't really want to go cause I was in a funk but I'm glad I did. We had a nice dinner and it cheered me up. (smile) I had also gone to the bookstore to buy some kid's books for an event at a local school. I felt bad because we hadn't gotten many donations. But we actually had stuff to give them anyway so it was all good.
Anyway, after dinner I came home and waited for Michael. He got home about 10p and brought me a bouquet of red roses, a balloon, and a card. It was very sweet. I actually hadn't expected anything. And the funniest part is that my therapist said that I should tell him to do such things more often since such gestures mean a lot to us girls. lol She'll be happy when I tell her he did it unprompted. She said it cause I wasn't expecting anything since we had gone to AWA and last year I waited until October to celebrate. And you know we girls like the romantic stuff. lol
Actually, Michael did get me more than that but I'll post them in another blog later since this one is really long. And I need to grab some breakfast. Hugs.
Sunday, September 23, 2007
Better Today
I feel a little better today but still achy in my head. Tired too even though I slept fairly well. Mike came back last night in a pretty good mood. We slept in and then had breakfast together. We talked about yesterday and the weeklong grumpiness. When I said that he could pretty much do whatever next year he asked, "We can't do things together?" Well, yeah, but it makes him snippy to try and coordinate us both. So, it's better that I just follow him like a puppy dog. He said that made it sound bad. No, but this is more his thing than mine. I mean, I'm interested in it but I don't know nearly as much as he does. So, I'm just along for the ride. Eventually we'll get it running smoothly.
I finished shopping for stuff. Got myself a few more small things. Next year I need to remember to bring enough money for a corset. I so want one. But I found little things. And I got enough buttons for everyone at the store and got Mike a few more items. So, it's all good.
I stayed in the room for the rest of the day and slept and just vegged. I needed that. When Mike came back we went to The Cheesecake Factory for dinner and talked about everything. We figured u=out what's been wrong lately. It comes down to miscommunication. There's more to it than that but I won't bore you with the details. It's all ok now again. We don't do too badly most of the time. We communicate pretty well 95% of the time. It's the other 5% that we have to work on. (sigh) But hey, I'll take that.
Tomorrow we plan to get home a little after lunch and just take the day easy. I need to grade stuff for the evening class. So, back to the grind.
I finished shopping for stuff. Got myself a few more small things. Next year I need to remember to bring enough money for a corset. I so want one. But I found little things. And I got enough buttons for everyone at the store and got Mike a few more items. So, it's all good.
I stayed in the room for the rest of the day and slept and just vegged. I needed that. When Mike came back we went to The Cheesecake Factory for dinner and talked about everything. We figured u=out what's been wrong lately. It comes down to miscommunication. There's more to it than that but I won't bore you with the details. It's all ok now again. We don't do too badly most of the time. We communicate pretty well 95% of the time. It's the other 5% that we have to work on. (sigh) But hey, I'll take that.
Tomorrow we plan to get home a little after lunch and just take the day easy. I need to grade stuff for the evening class. So, back to the grind.
Saturday, September 22, 2007
Widow Once More
By the title I am, of course, referring to Anime Weekend Atlanta (AWA). Last year I posted that I would be an anime widow once a year. Well, I apparently wasn't kidding even though I made a much better effort this year to participate. (sigh)
See, Mike has been going for a few years and he gets all hyped up about it. It's his guaranteed fun time every year. I like some of it but I am just not otaku enough for him to be happy with my tagging along. Oh, he wants me to come with him but let's face it, I am merely a distraction. I have admitted defeat this year. I thought it was all me last year because I was sick and stressed out but I see now that isn't really all it. Mike has a pattern here and I throw that off. I slow him down.
Mike's been incredibly grumpy lately. And I thought I had mood swings! He's been snappy and it pretty much boiled over this week. I don't know if I'm rubbing off on him or what but normally he's the calm one. (snort) And, of course, his moods have been affecting my moods. (sigh) Joyous fun and excitement.
Anyway, I am sick again but this time with that head cold that's been going around and I've been fighting off. I started feeling it come on yesterday. We got to Atlanta on Thursday night. Everything went fine with the hotel this time. We slept in a little and then did some stuff together. The main thing was dance lessons in preparation for last night's ball. We had fun with it and move pretty well together. So, I will definitely have to look into us doing that when we get home. We went our separate ways while I went to the mall to get my makeup done at the Clinique counter. It looked good. Mike looked awesome in his tux and I'll post those pics later. I don't have the connector for my camera. The ball was ok. I wanted to dance right away but Mike was "unwinding from the day" and we just sat there for a while. Made me feel grumpy. But eventually we did dance and it was lovely. We stayed for about 2 hours and then changed a little so we could go watch the hentai. It's always a riot because people go nuts with comments ("bring on the animated porn!"). lol
I apparently snored all night even though I had a nose strip on. I was so exhausted. And when I woke up, I didn't feel like myself at all. I felt like everything was coming from a long distance away. I just didn't feel connected. I still don't, not completely. So, we went to breakfast and then wandered around the dealers room. I bought Mike lots of stuff and got myself a few things. And I found a few more pins for the bookstore peeps. I need to get the rest tomorrow. Wanted to bring them something to show I was thinking about them. Jon, of course, is getting the most cause, well, he loves this stuff too. lol Maybe he needs to come with Mike next year. lol
I've made some contacts for possible signings and other stuff. I talked with one of my peers about helping her next year so, maybe if I'm working at the con Mike and I can keep from irking each other. Either that or I'll just drive next year and hang with Maya. Or work in the room. lol Everything seems to need to come back to work for me lately. It's about the only time when I feel productive and focused.
After wandering around I started to feel even more wretched so I came back to the room and passed out for a few hours. It gave Mike a chance to do his own thing and me an excuse to stay here. He came back to bring us dinner and was the happiest I've seen him in days. (sigh) I'm glad. I hate when he's grumpy. And I really don't mind being alone. Maybe that's what we need right now. Alone time. We don't get much of that because at home we feel like we have to spend our free time together since we don't see each other much. We love being together but we both inherently need alone time too. Another lesson learned.
So, there you go. As for the rest. . .we had some kiosk drama this year but nearly as much as last year. The worst part was the shipment not coming until the day before it was due. It really threw our schedule off and I didn't get a day off at all that week except for Saturday afternoon. Spent that shopping for the con so no real rest which is why I'm fried. The three newbies are gonna work out fine. They are good ones. I am so thankful for that. Everett is pleased with everything. As for the job, it's being left up to the new DM to make that call after an interview with me. It hasn't been set up yet but we'll see. There's a manager's meeting in mid-October so hopefully they will make up their minds by then. Mike's manager is gone too so they need to hire someone for there. School is going well but I just don't have any time for anything but work work work. I'm gonna give up reading anything "fun" and focus on my diss stuff during breaks. Burn out? Possibly but oh well. I'm not really happy unless I'm working a lot.
Well, hugs to all. Must get some rest now.
See, Mike has been going for a few years and he gets all hyped up about it. It's his guaranteed fun time every year. I like some of it but I am just not otaku enough for him to be happy with my tagging along. Oh, he wants me to come with him but let's face it, I am merely a distraction. I have admitted defeat this year. I thought it was all me last year because I was sick and stressed out but I see now that isn't really all it. Mike has a pattern here and I throw that off. I slow him down.
Mike's been incredibly grumpy lately. And I thought I had mood swings! He's been snappy and it pretty much boiled over this week. I don't know if I'm rubbing off on him or what but normally he's the calm one. (snort) And, of course, his moods have been affecting my moods. (sigh) Joyous fun and excitement.
Anyway, I am sick again but this time with that head cold that's been going around and I've been fighting off. I started feeling it come on yesterday. We got to Atlanta on Thursday night. Everything went fine with the hotel this time. We slept in a little and then did some stuff together. The main thing was dance lessons in preparation for last night's ball. We had fun with it and move pretty well together. So, I will definitely have to look into us doing that when we get home. We went our separate ways while I went to the mall to get my makeup done at the Clinique counter. It looked good. Mike looked awesome in his tux and I'll post those pics later. I don't have the connector for my camera. The ball was ok. I wanted to dance right away but Mike was "unwinding from the day" and we just sat there for a while. Made me feel grumpy. But eventually we did dance and it was lovely. We stayed for about 2 hours and then changed a little so we could go watch the hentai. It's always a riot because people go nuts with comments ("bring on the animated porn!"). lol
I apparently snored all night even though I had a nose strip on. I was so exhausted. And when I woke up, I didn't feel like myself at all. I felt like everything was coming from a long distance away. I just didn't feel connected. I still don't, not completely. So, we went to breakfast and then wandered around the dealers room. I bought Mike lots of stuff and got myself a few things. And I found a few more pins for the bookstore peeps. I need to get the rest tomorrow. Wanted to bring them something to show I was thinking about them. Jon, of course, is getting the most cause, well, he loves this stuff too. lol Maybe he needs to come with Mike next year. lol
I've made some contacts for possible signings and other stuff. I talked with one of my peers about helping her next year so, maybe if I'm working at the con Mike and I can keep from irking each other. Either that or I'll just drive next year and hang with Maya. Or work in the room. lol Everything seems to need to come back to work for me lately. It's about the only time when I feel productive and focused.
After wandering around I started to feel even more wretched so I came back to the room and passed out for a few hours. It gave Mike a chance to do his own thing and me an excuse to stay here. He came back to bring us dinner and was the happiest I've seen him in days. (sigh) I'm glad. I hate when he's grumpy. And I really don't mind being alone. Maybe that's what we need right now. Alone time. We don't get much of that because at home we feel like we have to spend our free time together since we don't see each other much. We love being together but we both inherently need alone time too. Another lesson learned.
So, there you go. As for the rest. . .we had some kiosk drama this year but nearly as much as last year. The worst part was the shipment not coming until the day before it was due. It really threw our schedule off and I didn't get a day off at all that week except for Saturday afternoon. Spent that shopping for the con so no real rest which is why I'm fried. The three newbies are gonna work out fine. They are good ones. I am so thankful for that. Everett is pleased with everything. As for the job, it's being left up to the new DM to make that call after an interview with me. It hasn't been set up yet but we'll see. There's a manager's meeting in mid-October so hopefully they will make up their minds by then. Mike's manager is gone too so they need to hire someone for there. School is going well but I just don't have any time for anything but work work work. I'm gonna give up reading anything "fun" and focus on my diss stuff during breaks. Burn out? Possibly but oh well. I'm not really happy unless I'm working a lot.
Well, hugs to all. Must get some rest now.
Monday, September 03, 2007
Results and Stuff
Ok, so sorry to have made you all wait. But no news is good news, right? Anyway, I am not diabetic or anything like that. My testosterone is a little high but we knew that because of the PCOS. So, no big surprise there. The rest of my levels were normal except that my cholesterol is a little high again so I need to behave. She's gonna retest me next month to check. Otherwise, she added a new med to see if it will help balance out the happy female times that seem to want to happen every two weeks instead of four. (sigh) Not sure it's gonna work though cause I just ended an almost two week run but we'll see since I only started the Metformin three weeks ago. If the combo doesn't work, then we'll be trying something else. (sigh) As for the anxiety and depression. . .that's much better. Lexapro seems to be the right one and is keeping me on a fairly even keel for the most part. I haven't had any major moments for a while. The last one was because of a hormone flux. Basically the jittery sessions happen before happy fun time. Otherwise, good to go.
Classes started two weeks ago. It's gonna be rough but I am enjoying being back. I am trying not to think about how much I have to do cause it stresses me out. Just taking it one day at a time.
As for the store. . .no word yet on what's going to happen. We should have a DM by the end of the month. That's pretty much the holdup. We're doing pretty well overall and getting stuff done. Always so much to do. The calendar kiosk goes up in two weeks so that should be interesting. I've hired some people for it and Everett is coming back (our kiosk guru) so I think it will be less hectic than last year. Especially as we only have one kiosk this year (thank God). Right now I'm just doing the best I can.
Well, that's about it. Hope you all are doing well. Hugs.
Classes started two weeks ago. It's gonna be rough but I am enjoying being back. I am trying not to think about how much I have to do cause it stresses me out. Just taking it one day at a time.
As for the store. . .no word yet on what's going to happen. We should have a DM by the end of the month. That's pretty much the holdup. We're doing pretty well overall and getting stuff done. Always so much to do. The calendar kiosk goes up in two weeks so that should be interesting. I've hired some people for it and Everett is coming back (our kiosk guru) so I think it will be less hectic than last year. Especially as we only have one kiosk this year (thank God). Right now I'm just doing the best I can.
Well, that's about it. Hope you all are doing well. Hugs.
Thursday, August 16, 2007
Quick Note
Just wanted to let you all know that I've been working my butt off at the store to try and get everything caught and cleaned up. Already put in my 40 but still so much to do. One of the other managers came by and helped me yesterday. She wanted to help give us some breathing room and to give suggestions. All of her help is very much appreciated. She'll be coming again at some point to help more. Yesterday was pretty much helping us get the returns boxed and rearranging some stuff up at the cash registers so it looks less cluttered. It's all pretty now.
I didn't get to mention it before, but last week I had blood work done. My "female" doctor finally acknowledged that part of my hyper problem could be hormonal. Been having problems with the female stuff still and it's been wearing on my nerves. I still find it funny that insurance companies will listen quicker to claims of mental problems than they will to female ones. But hey, it's all worked out.
Anyway, I'll try and write more about it all soon. I have a doctor appointment to find out the results today so hopefully I'll be able to report back. Hugs!
I didn't get to mention it before, but last week I had blood work done. My "female" doctor finally acknowledged that part of my hyper problem could be hormonal. Been having problems with the female stuff still and it's been wearing on my nerves. I still find it funny that insurance companies will listen quicker to claims of mental problems than they will to female ones. But hey, it's all worked out.
Anyway, I'll try and write more about it all soon. I have a doctor appointment to find out the results today so hopefully I'll be able to report back. Hugs!
Saturday, August 11, 2007
Live From Pittsburgh
So, apparently I spent a week in Pittsburgh and didn't know it. lol Turns out that when they went to change my status from assistant to interim manager, I was transferred to a store up in PA. We didn't catch it until Jon entered payroll last weekend. I was rather amused. I called Mike up and said, "Guess where I am?" "Where?" "Pittsburgh!" "Whaaaaaa?" heehee It was very funny. The added fun part was that I accidentally added a new employee to the Pittsburgh store because I didn't realize that it hadn't been fixed by the time I entered his info. So, he went with me. But it's all good now.
It was a very busy week. There is so much to do. We have inventory tomorrow. I need to get things organized for that. Fortunately we get extra hours for inventory so I am taking advantage of those hours this week and we'll be working towards getting the store cleaned up and organized.
So much to do, so little time. School starts in two weeks. I honestly don't know how I'm going to manage it all. But we'll see. Both Jon and Lindsay are doing their darnedest to work hard. And the two new people should be a good help. So, we'll be ok.
Anyway, I'm off today and taking advantage of resting since I worked hard all week. Hope you're all having a good one!
It was a very busy week. There is so much to do. We have inventory tomorrow. I need to get things organized for that. Fortunately we get extra hours for inventory so I am taking advantage of those hours this week and we'll be working towards getting the store cleaned up and organized.
So much to do, so little time. School starts in two weeks. I honestly don't know how I'm going to manage it all. But we'll see. Both Jon and Lindsay are doing their darnedest to work hard. And the two new people should be a good help. So, we'll be ok.
Anyway, I'm off today and taking advantage of resting since I worked hard all week. Hope you're all having a good one!
Thursday, August 02, 2007
One Final Drama Comment
Ok, all that drama stuff is behind us but I wanted to share something with you all. Not sure why Jonathan is still checking Melissa's myspace page since she dumped him off of it but there ya go. Probably so he could find what I'm going to share with you. Basically, my assessment of Melissa's attitude, etc was right. She posted on the 1st and vented about the store. She hadn't posted anything about the events until this:
"Life with me has been interesting as of late. As soon as I returned to SC from my Dad's funeral, I started working about 40 hours a week as the acting Assistant Manager at Waldenbooks. The actual assistant manager could not deal with working with my manager and decided to go out on leave due to stress! So for the past several months, I have been working hard and enjoying life. That all changed about four weeks ago. My manager and friend, Jess, told me that she was leaving Waldenbooks and going to a better opportunity. I was excited for her, but sad for me. She also told me that she put my name in to be considered as her replacement. That was quite a shock and an honor. So, I was preparing for an interview to be the manager. At this point, the assistant manager popped back in the picture and started up her crap again. She's miserable so she can't stand to see anyone happy. She's the kind that says all nice stuff to your face and then tries to find a way to stick a knife in your back. Anyway, she and her goon (one of my co-workers) decided to screw with me. So, I ended up deciding that I didn't want to manage either of them and that the store would have to find good management elsewhere. I waited until it was time for my interview and explained to the acting district manager that I was no longer interested in the position, but I had several things that she may want to be aware of that were going on in the store. She talked to me for about an hour, expressed her disappointment that she wouldn't be getting the opportunity to interview me and said she would make some calls regarding the information I gave her. Needless to say, the asst. manager and her goon may have gotten what they wanted but I put a few nails in their coffins on the way out of there. I figured whoever gets the store should at least be made aware of what they were going to have to deal with. So, as of last Friday, I am free!! I thought it was going to be sad leaving there but I guess since Jess had already left and the past two weeks had been miserable that it was a relief!! We celebrated Friday night and even went to Books-A-Million to shop!!!"
Ok, first of all, she was never acting assistant manager cause that position doesn't exist. As I was told recently because I'm acting manager, there is no assistant manager right now. It's not a position that gets temporarily filled. But whatever.
Second, Jess putting Melissa's "name in to be considered" for the job didn't mean that she had it. But that is obviously what she thought. Even if I hadn't been out on leave (and she makes it sound like I am a baby for leaving due to stress which was only half the problem) and Jess had said that, it wouldn't have mattered.
Third, ok, this part just makes me laugh. Crap? What crap? Oh wait, could the crap be wanting to reclaim the responsibility I have as the assistant? That I have to my job? As for not wanting to see anyone else be happy. . .(sigh). . .well, all I can say to that is I am a right idiot for wasting worry and mental pain on her. I was so torn up over how to make everyone happy -- including those who weren't making me happy -- that I ended up not being able to do it. I honestly don't know how I could stick a knife in her back when I tried to tell her to her face what my concerns were. Guess all she heard was me about to be competitive. Those comments sadden me. We could have been friends. But not with issues like that. I guess it's a good thing we never did get close because it would hurt more. It shouldn't hurt now but it does a little. I mourn the loss of a potential good friend. But I won't bash my head over it. As for calling Jon a "goon". Ok, I called her a bitch so I guess that's fair. But anyone who knows us knows that he is so not my henchman. That's what she makes it sound like. Ok, one last time, can we say martyr?
Fourth, notice she says that she "decided that she didn't want to manage either of" us. lol She is assuming that she had the job.
Last, yeah, she complained and I got yelled at. But this time I had my side in first and haven't had any comments since. If we can get everything under control, we'll be ok. All Melissa did before she left was to complain to anyone who would listen to her about Jon and I (on the floor to customers and co-workers like). She didn't do much work and what she did do was half-assed. I find it funny that she claimed that we were unprofessional when she was saying things like, "If he says one word to me, I'm walking out."
I showed this to my therapist this morning and you should have seen her reactions. Basically, she said some of the same things I mention above. Melissa has issues. I don't know how much of her ranting will hurt me for getting the job. And right now, I don't really care because I need to take care of what are my responsibilities. Even if they don't last as mine, they are mine to do now. Customers have been happy to have me back and I hear that a lot. Makes me feel good. As far as I can tell, none of Jess's regulars are leaving us. Why? Because we can still give them the service they want. So, I'll just keep plugging along and do the best I can. This can work. But that chapter is at an end. Time for a new book.
"Life with me has been interesting as of late. As soon as I returned to SC from my Dad's funeral, I started working about 40 hours a week as the acting Assistant Manager at Waldenbooks. The actual assistant manager could not deal with working with my manager and decided to go out on leave due to stress! So for the past several months, I have been working hard and enjoying life. That all changed about four weeks ago. My manager and friend, Jess, told me that she was leaving Waldenbooks and going to a better opportunity. I was excited for her, but sad for me. She also told me that she put my name in to be considered as her replacement. That was quite a shock and an honor. So, I was preparing for an interview to be the manager. At this point, the assistant manager popped back in the picture and started up her crap again. She's miserable so she can't stand to see anyone happy. She's the kind that says all nice stuff to your face and then tries to find a way to stick a knife in your back. Anyway, she and her goon (one of my co-workers) decided to screw with me. So, I ended up deciding that I didn't want to manage either of them and that the store would have to find good management elsewhere. I waited until it was time for my interview and explained to the acting district manager that I was no longer interested in the position, but I had several things that she may want to be aware of that were going on in the store. She talked to me for about an hour, expressed her disappointment that she wouldn't be getting the opportunity to interview me and said she would make some calls regarding the information I gave her. Needless to say, the asst. manager and her goon may have gotten what they wanted but I put a few nails in their coffins on the way out of there. I figured whoever gets the store should at least be made aware of what they were going to have to deal with. So, as of last Friday, I am free!! I thought it was going to be sad leaving there but I guess since Jess had already left and the past two weeks had been miserable that it was a relief!! We celebrated Friday night and even went to Books-A-Million to shop!!!"
Ok, first of all, she was never acting assistant manager cause that position doesn't exist. As I was told recently because I'm acting manager, there is no assistant manager right now. It's not a position that gets temporarily filled. But whatever.
Second, Jess putting Melissa's "name in to be considered" for the job didn't mean that she had it. But that is obviously what she thought. Even if I hadn't been out on leave (and she makes it sound like I am a baby for leaving due to stress which was only half the problem) and Jess had said that, it wouldn't have mattered.
Third, ok, this part just makes me laugh. Crap? What crap? Oh wait, could the crap be wanting to reclaim the responsibility I have as the assistant? That I have to my job? As for not wanting to see anyone else be happy. . .(sigh). . .well, all I can say to that is I am a right idiot for wasting worry and mental pain on her. I was so torn up over how to make everyone happy -- including those who weren't making me happy -- that I ended up not being able to do it. I honestly don't know how I could stick a knife in her back when I tried to tell her to her face what my concerns were. Guess all she heard was me about to be competitive. Those comments sadden me. We could have been friends. But not with issues like that. I guess it's a good thing we never did get close because it would hurt more. It shouldn't hurt now but it does a little. I mourn the loss of a potential good friend. But I won't bash my head over it. As for calling Jon a "goon". Ok, I called her a bitch so I guess that's fair. But anyone who knows us knows that he is so not my henchman. That's what she makes it sound like. Ok, one last time, can we say martyr?
Fourth, notice she says that she "decided that she didn't want to manage either of" us. lol She is assuming that she had the job.
Last, yeah, she complained and I got yelled at. But this time I had my side in first and haven't had any comments since. If we can get everything under control, we'll be ok. All Melissa did before she left was to complain to anyone who would listen to her about Jon and I (on the floor to customers and co-workers like). She didn't do much work and what she did do was half-assed. I find it funny that she claimed that we were unprofessional when she was saying things like, "If he says one word to me, I'm walking out."
I showed this to my therapist this morning and you should have seen her reactions. Basically, she said some of the same things I mention above. Melissa has issues. I don't know how much of her ranting will hurt me for getting the job. And right now, I don't really care because I need to take care of what are my responsibilities. Even if they don't last as mine, they are mine to do now. Customers have been happy to have me back and I hear that a lot. Makes me feel good. As far as I can tell, none of Jess's regulars are leaving us. Why? Because we can still give them the service they want. So, I'll just keep plugging along and do the best I can. This can work. But that chapter is at an end. Time for a new book.
Wednesday, August 01, 2007
Am I a Nerd, Geek, or Dork?
Your Score: Modern, Cool Nerd
60 % Nerd, 60% Geek, 21% Dork
For The Record:
A Nerd is someone who is passionate about learning/being smart/academia.
A Geek is someone who is passionate about some particular area or subject, often an obscure or difficult one.
A Dork is someone who has difficulty with common social expectations/interactions.
You scored better than half in Nerd and Geek, earning you the title of: Modern, Cool Nerd.
Nerds didn't use to be cool, but in the 90's that all changed. It used to be that, if you were a computer expert, you had to wear plaid or a pocket protector or suspenders or something that announced to the world that you couldn't quite fit in. Not anymore. Now, the intelligent and geeky have eked out for themselves a modicum of respect at the very least, and "geek is chic." The Modern, Cool Nerd is intelligent, knowledgable and always the person to call in a crisis (needing computer advice/an arcane bit of trivia knowledge). They are the one you want as your lifeline in Who Wants to Be a Millionaire (or the one up there, winning the million bucks)!
Congratulations!
THE NERD? GEEK? OR DORK? TEST
| Link: The Nerd? Geek? or Dork? Test written by donathos on OkCupid Free Online Dating, home of the The Dating Persona Test |
Which Buffy Character Am I?
Ok, now for a change of pace:
Your Score: Dawn Summers
63% amorality, 54% passion, 63% spirituality, 81% selflessness
Dawn is a person driven by her love for her friends and her desire to make a difference. Perhaps you are, too. You're willing to do whatever is necessary to do what is right for those you care about, and sometimes this can get you in a little bit of trouble.
Most of all, however, you have a heart of gold.
Congratulations!
THE 4-VARIABLE BUFFY PERSONALITY TEST
| Link: The 4-Variable Buffy Personality Test written by donathos on OkCupid Free Online Dating, home of the The Dating Persona Test |
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